For a long time I did not really feel good.  It showed.  It showed in my body, my face and reflected out into the world.

It was not pretty.

Part of why I did not feel good were my beliefs.  One such belief was my thoughts about what motherhood should look.

I had what can be called the “mother martyr”  syndrome.  I believed that being a good mother meant taking care of everyone else before myself.

I gave and gave to my family and to others the point that I looked and felt so depleted.  Then just the opposite happened.  I had moments of being a not so good mom.  I became angry and resentful. I’d forgotten about me.  I’d forgotten about fun.

This was not the picture I had in mind about motherhood.

The most important thing I did for myself and my family was to take care of myself first.


Whether you have children or not, the most important thing you can do for yourself is take care of you and your needs first.

When we do that, we actually show up more fully for those we love.  We feel more vibrant and alive.  We we feel good, our loved ones will feel good too.

One of the keys I had to learn was to have fun.  Somewhere during my yearly motherhood years I stopped having fun.

I’d forgotten about me and what I liked to do.  What I needed.

I had to shift my mindset around fun and give myself permission to do so.


It was not just about having fun though.  It was a complete mind set shift and overhaul of my internal belief system.

Feeling good meant allowing myself to weave fun back into my life.

I did.  It was not always comfortable at first.  I had begun to realize that having fun triggered safety issues for me.  Getting support around that helped me bust through those beliefs.

At 45 years old I look and feel so much better than I did at 40.  I am committed to creating some fun and relaxation into my days.

On that note, I am taking the rest of the day off to hang out lakeside with my daughter and some of our mom and kids friends.

Fun, sun and relaxation feels so good.  It soothes the soul and energizes our bodies.

If you are struggling with low energy, creative blocks or plain old frustration and anger, I encourage you to step back and go have a bit of fun.  See how play can re-energize you.

Give yourself permission to take care of yourself in this way.

What will you do today to feel good? Share in the comments below.

I’d love to know.

Here’s to toes in the sand and feeling good!

Happy August friends.

Much love,



PS.  Are you struggling with your own internal belief system and how to shift it?  If so I invite you to apply for a complimentary courage awareness session.  Together we can assess where you are stuck.


2 comments to “Feel Good Friday”

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  1. Karen Kirkpatrick - Aug 03, 2014 Reply

    I find often that I don’t think about myself or even think of taking care of myself. The worries and what if’s drift into my mind many times a day especially when I am teaching. I have to keep telling myself you are doing the best you can. I just have to see it myself sometimes. Thanks for sharing your journey.

    • Kat

      Kat - Aug 03, 2014 Reply

      Karen you are welcome. Thanks for reaching out.
      Many of us, especially women, were taught to to care of everyone else before ourselves. It can be a challenging pattern to shift and even feel uncomfortable in the beginning when we start to take care of ourselves more. Trust me, when we do everyone around us benefits.
      Do something nurturing or fun for YOU this week and let us know how it went.

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